Sunday, July 18, 2010
Positive Discipline Tool Card - Logical Consequences
Too often logical consequences are poorly disguised punishments.
1) Use consequences rarely. Instead, focus on solutions.
2) When appropriate, follow the
Four Rs of Logical Consequences:
4) Revealed in advance when possible.
This is such a hard one for parents. We either want to rescue our children from the logical consequence or we want to pile on a little extra punishment so they will learn their lesson. Dr. Jane Nelsen has used the example of a child who spills the milk. The logical consequence would be that the child cleans up the spilled milk. But often parents will clean up the spilled milk for the child while they are scolding the child so they will feel bad for their mistake. Or they will make the child clean up the spilled milk and scrub the entire kitchen floor while they are at it so they will learn their lesson. But if we follow the Four Rs of Logical Consequences, we can respectfully help our children take responsibility for their actions.
Here is a good article by Dr. Jane Nelsen on using solutions.