Tuesday, May 26, 2009

How To Tell If You Are A Stressed Out Single Dad


Step One: Check in the mirror for gray hair.

Step Two: If you have experienced 5 or more of the following scientifically proven indicators you are officially a stressed out single dad. I have personally experienced ALL of them!!!

  1. You drive away from the gas station with the gas pump still attached to your gas tank.
  2. Your kids are involved in Piano Lessons, Karate, Basketball, Dance, and Scouts. ALL IN THE SAME DAY!!!
  3. You have frequent heart palpitations.
  4. You can quote lines from every Disney movie made in the last 10 years.
  5. Grocery shopping ALL BY YOURSELF is the most satisfying part of your week.
  6. You TiVo the Oprah Winfrey Show.
  7. You can do laundry and dishes in your sleep...and you often do.
  8. You log more miles than a New York cab driver.
  9. You have the school calendar memorized, but your personal calendar is empty.
  10. You go to the dentist for a root canal and it is the most relaxing part of your day.

3 comments:

Lynn Lott said...

Brad, you get funnier and funnier. Hopefully your kids won't grow up and leave home before you become a world famous stand-up comedian. They keep you in great material.

Dr. Jane Nelsen said...

Brad, I agree with Lynn. I laugh outloud--or want to cry.

Pete and Lauren said...

Brad, You're the best. I miss you guys. I love the blog. Hope you're all great. I'm in mom-heaven out here. Do you have a facebook page? We're probably already 'friends' and I just don't remember. :-|